Compassion = Love and Support

CHICAGO, ILLINOIS - I travel a lot, you all know that by now. It never fails, I always meet at least one person that made me glad I took the trip. Once in awhile, I meet someone that makes me vow to see them again, no matter what I have to do to make that happen. This is Marylee, and she is completely deceptive. When I say that, I don’t mean that she is in any way dishonest; but rather, you can’t look at her and assume you really know her story. She is petite, gorgeous and looks like the most delicate flower (like all the ladies in her family). Wrong, wrong, wrong. Marylee is an oak, strong all the way down to her roots. She is a cancer survivor, but on this blog that wouldn’t really be a surprise, would it? Here is what she told me about the rest of her story, though – the thing that puts her in my ‘hero’ category:

“In my lifetime I've cared for three women whose lives were coming to an end. When each passed, I knew I provided them with an attentive and loving environment, but all I did was grieve after their passing. I never felt that I could, in any measure stop their pain or the disease; I experienced feelings of failure. Time is a healer. Eventually I came to terms with the reality that all we can do as human beings, is to give our love and support to those who need us, and be content that at least we did something.”

Yea, that is Marylee. Just living the best example one can ever give – that of giving total love and support to her fellow human beings. I watched her grandson skate over to her a few weeks ago and hand her a flower in her honor. Well, I tried to watch. I was really crying too hard to see much of anything. But I did clap really loud.

“Quamtotius”

WARSAW, INDIANA - We are all, we are total, we are complete. We cancer warriors may have had bits and pieces of us removed, medicated or radiated, but we are still whole people. We are varied; there is not a segment of society that hasn't been touched by cancer, not a race, not a religion, not a height nor weight group that doesn’t wear our badge. We are all totally different and yet have so much in common. Here are my unique bits: I myself like hockey. A lot. Chicago Blackhawks, thank you very much. (Check out my Blackhawks sweater.) I am a mommy and think my children have flawless hearts and souls. I am a wife, and think my husband deserves more than I can ever give him. I am a daughter, and while I have a 'bucket list', I am sad to think that my mom never got to finish her own list. I am an American, and have voted for all major parties. I am an employee, and have fierce loyalty to Vera Bradley because they are American dreamers that actually included compassion in their dreams. I am a Christian, and in honor of that I try to love everyone. You may not be any of those things, but still you have cancer in your life. Doesn’t that just bind us all the more to one another?

So this is me, and I am the cancer everyman. We don’t just wear hospital gowns; so keep in mind that when you sit next to someone on the train, at church, at the ice rink, in the restaurant, in the theatre, at the game. We own the local pottery studio, work at the local insurance company, the local car wash, and in the cubical just down from yours. Thank you, to those that donate to help one or all of us. =We can't all say thank you, but I know we all wish we could!

A Girl's Best Friend

WARSAW, INDIANA - The company for whom I work, Vera Bradley, likes to be a 'Girl's Best Friend', and those of us that love them know they sure are! This weekend, I met a young lady who sets a beautiful example that we can all follow. When she was 11 years old she and her best friend did everything that 6th grade girls do. They hung out nearly every day, ran to each other's houses, etc. (They lived 27 seconds away from each other.) One day when her friend came to school, she was very upset; her mother had just been diagnosed with breast cancer. This was the first time she had encountered breast cancer, and they were both scared. At 11 years of age, all they knew was that it was extremely scary and dire. So for the next several months, she stayed by the side of her friend. She was there for her friend, and for her friends mom as much as anyone could be; comforting without knowing what this terrible disease really was. Now, years later, she still keeps in touch with this dear friend. Her friend's mom is in remission and is a strong survivor. This young lady is now a magnificent athlete and a beautiful ice dancer. She dedicated her time last weekend – in between tests for school, mind you – for a breast cancer event in Ohio. Thank you, Emily, for being such a compassionate and philanthropic person. You are the total personification of a ‘Girl's Best Friend’!

National Treasures

COLUMBUS, OHIO - So while God was handing out the good stuff to each person, I decided to go back for seconds to the ‘dorky history fanatic’line. The kids you see pictured here were a bit more judicious and went to the ‘beautiful talented smart compassionate’ line. They are all of these things, of course, but what I saw shining through this weekend was the ‘compassionate’ part. These are people who deserve to be admired (daily!) by all of us. Not because they can do more things on ice with knives on their boots than you and I can do in orthopedic shoes on dry pavement, no, not just that. Because they each decided to spend a few days dedicating themselves to raising funds for breast cancer research. The faces you are looking at will be very familiar to you soon, if they aren’t already. The next Olympic games will be a showcase for some of them, and I pray they all achieve their dreams. They stopped their crazy busy schedules to come to Carolyn Bongiorno’s “Skate For Hope” and give everyone who attended a reason to be in AWE. They did it for grandmas with breast cancer, for moms and moms of friends, for coaches, for mentors (hyperlink to the Dorothy Hamill post on the word ‘mentors’), the list is endless. They have all been touched, and they decided to do something about it with their staggering talents. THANK YOU Emily, Rockne & Keauna, Rachel, Evan & Emily, Ben & Brooke and Ryan (please be careful with those flips, man o man) for all that you do, for all you have done, and for all that you will be. Special thanks to Amy – you are the best substitute grandma I know. :) You truly are our National Treasures.

In her shoes

PHOENIX, ARIZONA - This is Catherine Hill. She works for the Vera Bradley Foundation for Breast Cancer. She is a mommy, a wife, a daughter, a sister. She has a dog named Smokey and a Buddha in her garden. She loves her husband, who writes her poetry and plays songs for her on the guitar. She assembles and directs one of the largest amateur women's golf and tennis tournaments every year in Fort Wayne, Indiana. This week, she will be wearing shoes for all of us when she helps to crew the Vera Bradley team in the Race Across America. She loves bikes, everyone, so this is a really big deal for her. What say you give her a little shout-out and say hi to her on facebook in the comment section - and while you are there, learn a bit more about the rest of the team. Go Catherine! The home team is rooting you on!!!

For the boys

TIPP CITY, OHIO - So there he was, this tall, handsome fellow with a stunning wife. I walked into the event at Urban Ava and they were just sitting there chatting. You know how you see people sometimes and you just know that they are clever and sophisticated and cool? That’s what Ron and Joanne are like. Just wow. So I am introduced to him like this “Heidi, this is Ron. He is our other breast cancer survivor/speaker”. WHAT? WHAT? This polished gentleman with the jaunty hat, a breast cancer survivor? So I chat with him and learn that he is a high school teacher, varsity basketball coach, proud father of an OSU athlete, and lover of people – both young and old. He is a really great guy who just happens to have also had a mastectomy. This isn’t just a disease that affects women; I say it all the time. Sometimes you can be this amazing and totally masculine person who’s been dealt the ‘beer hand’ in life’s little genetic poker game. Here’s to you, Ron. May you have a happy, long life and continue to tell people about how crucial this research is for all people – both girls and boys.

Harp!

APOPKA, FLORIDA - The first known harp dates back to 2500 B.C. in Egypt. By the 17th century, they began to resemble the type of harp that we see in images today. What on earth does this have to do with breast cancer research? Because this is the first time I have seen one this close in person, and it is way cool! I was actually told some time ago that music form the harp is used in some cancer centers as a form of auditory relaxation technique, and now I know why. Greg’s Hallmark had a breast cancer party and a local harpist donated her time to provide gentle music – a first for the Foundation on the Road! I think I am going to get a CD and use it for bedtime music (for me and for the kids). I love that Greg and his remarkable team took the time to hold this event; and that they learned that so many of their customers were survivors! What a wonderful day, what a great party. I can’t wait to see them all again.